This time last year, i was in Morocco for Ramadhan. It was one of the best decision I’ve made thus far.
Many questioned me ‘You went to turkey 3 months ago, why do you need another holiday?’ ‘You are only a year into your job, would it be risky to quit now?’ On top of that, my boss offered a pay raise. In 1 year of working, my salary was increased by $500 but I turned it all down.
But why? Why did i leave what seemed to be a cool jump in my career?
I know what i wanted. I know that i should be treated with respect. I know that the pay increment would mean 24/7 commitment to my boss. I know my rights as a staff. This was my 2nd encounter with an unacceptable character and expectations. Also, i had lesser commitments financially.
I knew this was my moment to focus on myself. I felt like I’ve had enough, I’ve gone through enough and if there’s anyone who should be concern of my mental health is myself. I know i have a choice and I know that if i didn’t put a stop to it, i will be stuck in a viscous cycle and i don’t know if i can pull myself out, ever.
We need to be constantly aware of our hearts, mind and body. To know and ask
Why are you meant to experience this?
Why are you putting yourself in such situation?
Work your way through it by:
- Increasing your imaan
- Trying your best
- Improving your character
Once you’ve given your all, its time to take your leave with your heart and mind at ease. With all these in place, the decision made is never with regret but assurance that:
I know myself better now
I know I’ve approached the matter in ways i never thought i could
I’ve given my best
Being firm with your decision is utmost important as it will get harder soon (next post). Solat Istiharah will only make you stronger and sure of your decision. Consult The One with this powerful dua:
‘O Allah, if You know that this matter is good for me with regard to my religion, my livelihood and the end of my affair then decree it for me, facilitate it for me, and grant me blessing in it. And if You know that this matter is bad for me with regard to my religion, my livelihood and the end of my affair then turn it away from me and me from it; and decree for me better than it, wherever it may be, and make me content with it’